The Day My World Stopped: Losing #JennieBonita (1 November 2025)

 The Day My World Stopped: Losing Jennie (1 November 2025)

1 November 2025
The date is burned into me now.
The day my life split into “before” and “after.”
The day I lost my fiancee, my partner, my soulmate, my Jennie.

I still don’t know how to write this.
I still don’t know how to make sense of it.
But I need to put these words somewhere, because keeping them inside is like trying to hold back a tidal wave with my hands.

Jennie passed away on 1 November 2025, and nothing has felt real since.

For more than 11 years, it was me and Jennie, our home, our routines, our laughter, our arguments, our plans, our stupid jokes, our late‑night chats, our mornings, our nights, our life.
We built everything together.
We survived things together.
We fought battles side by side that nobody else even knew about.

And then suddenly, I was standing in a world where Jennie wasn’t breathing anymore.

People talk about grief like it’s something you “go through,” like it’s a tunnel with a light at the end.
But when you lose the person you shared your life with, the love of your life, it isn’t a tunnel.
It’s a collapse.
It’s the floor disappearing under you, your whole world has gone.
It’s waking up every morning and remembering all over again that the person you love isn’t coming back.

The days after Jen she passed were a blur, shock, paperwork, phone calls, questions, silence.
I didn’t sleep.
I didn’t eat properly.
I didn’t know what to do with myself.
I still don’t.

I kept expecting Jennie to walk into the room.
I kept expecting Jennie's voice.
I kept expecting Jennie's laugh.
I kept expecting Jennie.

But Jennie isn’t there.

And the world didn’t stop.
People carried on like nothing had happened

But for me, everything had.

I’m writing this now because I need somewhere to put the truth out there about what we went through and still are to this day.
I need somewhere to say Jennie's name without fear of tears.
I need somewhere to honour the woman I loved for more than a decade, the woman who filled my life with love and laughter.

This isn’t a post about healing.
I’m nowhere near that point if here is a point!.
This is a post about loss, about love, and about the moment everything changed.

Jennie, I miss and love you more than I can ever put into words.
I don’t know how to do life without you.
But I’m trying to keep going, one breath at a time, because you’d want me to.

This is the first blog post I’ve written since you passed.
It won’t be the last I assure you that.
I’ll keep telling our story, the real story, because Jennie deserves that.

And because a love like ours doesn’t end because others have stolen paperwork out of our home and is manipulating their own stories to suit their agenda to say Jennie had no one in her life, it was just Jennie! 

Erm, okay...

That's another blog post story, but this isn't about that, its about our love, our memories, our time together, true love doesn't die, our memories don't fade, my love lives on.

Always.